As the rules of lockdown have eased once again us here at Tagged have considered what lockdown has meant for us as individuals. We would like to share with you our highs and lows of lock down, it is important to acknowledge how this year has affected us. Alongside the peaks of perfecting your banana bread many of us are highly aware as to how this year has had an impact on ourselves.
Maddy
My highs of lockdown.
1.Lockdown has helped me find the most wonderful places, nearby to where I live that I wouldn’t have made time for. I love going for walks, but it isn’t something I would choose to do every weekend. Likewise, there are places that I’ve heard of and always wanted to go but never made the effort to, lockdown has granted me the time to go and explore them.
2. I no longer wear make-up to work! As I started to work from home I would only do my make-up for Zoom calls. Until one day I didn’t have time, to my surprise, not one comment was made. So, when I started going back into the office I made the conscious decision to not wear any make-up and I couldn’t be prouder of myself for making that step as it completely boosted my confidence at work, it feels liberating!
My lows of lockdown.
1. Anxiety. I’ve always worried that I’m being “dramatic”, and it wasn’t until I finally opened up to a friend that I realised that was my own anxiety speaking. At the start of lockdown, I cherished the time I received. However, since the beginning of the 3rd lockdown in January 2021, I have had more days where I’ve struggled and cried, than days where I haven’t.
It has been helpful to recognise that, whilst we’re inundated with media telling us we have more time to try and accomplish new tasks... we’ve also had more time to struggle and more time to cry.
Laura
My highs and lows of lockdown.
I was unlucky enough to lose one of my creative jobs in lockdown - however this turned into a high when we decided to pick ourselves up and create our own radio station which is now my job! A big low for me has been postponing my wedding, this had left me fighting with my own body because I was feeling low. I ate my way out to happiness and then was getting annoyed at the amount of weight I'd put on in lockdown, but let me stress, this is normal. I sometimes feel guilty as a promoter of body positivity that I then look at myself and don't like what I see so I start the next fad diet. But it's so hard to avoid! Especially in lockdown when you are bored stuck in the house it's been easy to just spend my time eating or baking. But I've come to recognise that these are unprecedented times, and sometimes baking and eating cake makes me feel better. And if that makes me feel better then I'm not going to beat myself up about it anymore. Of course a low has to be not seeing my friends and family, but the advances in technology has made it easier for us to spend more time with each other virtually. The extra time we've had at home has also added to my highs has allowed me to spend more time with my partner and my little (not so little anymore) dog Dwight. And whilst lockdown may have left us without theatre... it has given us time to be creative and work on ideas so when we're out of lockdown, we can be back with Tagged bigger and better than ever!
Annie
So my highs of the last year would probably be learning the joy of taking time for myself, and having the opportunity to reflect on my career path and where I want to be (if the cafe I worked at hadn't have closed, I wouldn't have taken the next step in my socially engaged career in working in care!)...I've also had a lot of positive changes in the lockdowns, moving house, the new job, getting a car...and my relationships with people, especially my housemate, have been better because I feel I've appreciated our time together more.
My lows would obviously be the lack of places to socialise, especially during winter where it was too cold and miserable to meet friends outside. The lack of theatre in my life, and panic that it would never properly return. The restrictions of not seeing my family, and constant panic that I might have picked something (covid) up- not fear for myself, but fear that I'd be passing it on to the residents that rely on my care, or family if I saw them.
Jess
My lockdown highs and lows are a mixture of many things. There were good days and bad days, but overall I think I enjoyed the quiet and the calm, even though there was chaos going on all over the world. Is it strange to say it was rather tranquil? All of a sudden I had so much time to myself. I was able to reflect on who I am, what I want for my life and what I want to do with my life. I felt lucky and grateful for my friends and family keeping mainly safe. I was grateful for the time I had to spend with my loved one. We were able to get to know each other on a whole other level because we were forced to spend more time together. Don't get me wrong, there were low days, feelings of isolation, missing friends and family. But I think overall I just feel grateful to have gotten through it safely and relieved my friends and family were able to stay safe. There is something quite compelling about being a part of history. A moment in time that we will be teaching children about in 15-20 years time. I think the remnants of covid 19 will be with us forever. As if a crack in history and time that may never heal, but will remind us of a time where communities came together to help the weak and vulnerable, school classes were bubbles and remote learning was a force to be reckoned with. It will definitely be a moment in time that I will never forget
Eibhlis
Highs-
These lockdowns have really allowed me to work on myself, who I am as an artist, who I am as a partner and how I can play with some of my favourite recipes. Usually in our fast paced world, these are things before I would have neglected. However, in-between lockdowns I have managed to integrate the practises in my daily life. Lockdown has given me the time to look after myself and think about how I want to continue to grow. It’s provided me a space to really learn how I want to use my time and has given me the opportunity to breathe. Sometimes I feel like I shouldn’t go forward with pursuing my ambitions but lockdown has made me view how I spend my time in a completely different way. It doesn’t always mean I have to be productive, I just have to value my self-care and creativity above other things!
Lows- I am a pretty social creature not in a big way but I miss making and sharing food with the people I love. I cannot wait until I can properly be with my loved ones again. Being isolated has led to feeling isolated. It sometimes made me think that I don’t have friends but I am glad that I am able to now recognise that it was part of being in lockdown for so long. I know my friends care about me as I do them, they are always a phone call away. It's been difficult to make theatre and be creative in the same way. I’ve managed to adapt, one way has been by starting my own podcast with my partner. However, I am still so excited to get back into that rehearsal room and do mad stuff again!
It’s been so insightful to see how we have all experienced lockdown, personal growth has been such a beautiful topic to read and write about whilst putting together this blog post. This time has certainly brought many challenges that we had to talk about but I hope reading this you gained the same feeling we did, I am not alone.
Whilst it's difficult to see the end it’s good to know how well you have done and to talk about the difficulties this year has presented you with. Even if you never finished that book you had meant to read your whole life you’ve done so well. At Tagged we know how important it is to talk about these heavy subjects so we know that while you feel alone, many will have a shared experience. While things are not quite back to normal we can only continue to hope things get better.